Physical Intimacy in a relationship
Physical Intimacy is the physical attraction and comfort that the partners feel towards each other. This includes sexual desire, sexual intimacy as well as non-sexual touching and bonding in a relationship.
Non sexual touch can include holding hands, hugging, kissing, cuddling, holding each other etc. This is a way of showing your affection to your partner and it also improves the comfort for the both of you with each other. Even an understanding look or a smile can be intimate. Non sexual touch and closeness can also lead on to foreplay and sex too but not necessarily.
Talk to each other about sex. Being reluctant to talk about sex to your spouse will rob you of opportunities to have a fulfilling sex life. Many times couples don’t talk to each other regarding sex because either they are shy or they don’t have the appropriate vocabulary for genital organs or for intercourse, foreplay etc. Read up appropriate material to gain confidence.
Look at sex as making love. Let your spouse know regarding your interest areas and what you get excited, your expectations etc, and get to know his/her preferences. Also understand that though you have shared your expectations, your partner is not obliged to fulfill them, if not comfortable with it. It is important that both of you are aware of each other’s preferences, interests and comfort. Discuss regarding your respective sexual attitudes, anxieties and concerns with each other. Satisfaction for the both of you is important. If you are not sure if your spouse is satisfied, it is ok to ask about it and talk to each other.
During foreplay, explore each other using all your senses – sense of smell, touch, sound, visual and taste. Multi sensory excitement can provide greater satisfaction in your sex life. Relax in each other’s presence. Foreplay increases the arousal of the woman especially. It is important that both partners are well aroused. Focus on the bodily sensations and learn to enjoy them.
The time after love-making provides an excellent opportunity for bonding. It’s the time when both of you are relaxed and satisfied. Don’t go to sleep immediately. Hold hands, chat, ask about how each other feels, cuddle, snuggle, do what you are comfortable with. Intimacy is not to be demanded by rule but is to be nurtured, cared for in a relationship.
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